Do you ever feel as though you’re being followed? There’s this moment when you pause, listen for the tell-tale footfall, then start moving again. You tell yourself to act cool, pretend you don’t notice, because if the follower knows that you know, something bad will happen.

So you try not to move faster, but you do. You plan your escape. You notice routes, other people. You make sure your phone is ready to dial.

Or maybe you play it cool and just stop, wait to see who shows up, and prepare to find out what’s going on.

Or maybe you’re more the type to pretend to get a phone call…from a made-up martial arts instructor, reminding you that you’re running late to pick up your triple-onyx black belt trophy from when you won the world championship…again.

The point is, it’s uncomfortable to notice that someone might be following you. But the reality is, if you’re on the internet, you’re definitely being followed. Actually, an entire cast of rival gangs is following you.

They’re most certainly checking out what you like, what you don’t like, what you shop for, where you shop, what you watch on TV, what you mention to your friends. They take note even when you spend a few extra seconds trying to read the caption of some obscure image that you really don’t care about. Unfortunately, now they think you do.

Sometimes, they’re there because you invited them in: app tracking, loyalty programs, email lists, and social media follows. Other times, it’s because privacy has become an adorable idea that has been gone for ages, much like dining etiquette.

There’s this thing called UTM (Urchin Tracking Module) that attaches bits of code so that every time you click on a link, an advertiser is told not only where you go, but how you got there. And who sent you.

Cookies don’t just fill up your cache with unwanted data; they also notice your usual haunts. They’re mapping you out and, in a very real way, figuring out your usual haunts.

Retargeting is that experience where you speak out loud, in the vicinity of your phone, and suddenly everyone seems to know. You might tell someone how you’ve heard a friend has taken up a Japanese paper folding technique, and suddenly Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, mobile games, and even news sites are all offering to sell you origami supplies and tutorials. Turns out you’re not going crazy! They’re just gaslighting you…in a way.

Predictive advertising says that if you do A, you’ll likely do B next, and then C. This is established by one very obvious example. If a woman starts looking at baby names, due date calculators, and nursery furniture, advertisers know exactly how to target her for the next 40 weeks — and frankly, for the next 40 years.

What to expect when you’re expecting? Expect to be targeted, very specifically, by baby-themed advertisers, then child-themed advertisers, then teens, young adults, grandchildren, retirement, and beyond. Advertisers have long memories and love to share your data.

Engagement tracking, location data, recommendation engines, are all checking out where you go, how long you stay there, who is with you, and what you’ll do next. Lookalike audiences place you into categories and make assumptions based on what people similar to you do. We’ll talk a lot about lookalike audiences in future issues.

Even if you answer no to every request for data tracking, an advertiser can create a shadow profile on you based on your contacts, photos you’re tagged in, inferred relationships, shared devices, and other household members.

Marketing has gone way beyond “women ages 35-55, making $75,000-$120,000 a year, living within 25 miles of this zip code.” It now tracks your emotional state, your coping mechanisms, your aspirations, and your weaknesses.

You are being followed. Even creepier: they already know where you’re going and are probably waiting at your destination, with a few necessities on hand, because they know what you’re going to need when you get there.

Modern marketing doesn’t just want your attention anymore. It wants a map of your behavior.